Do you think you’re guilty of sabotaging your happiness? I know I am. There are so many ways we can stumble over our own feet trying to find a happy place in our lives. Often, we don’t even realize the many ways we can hold ourselves back. I’m still a work in progress when it comes to learning how to stop defeating myself and destroying my joy in the process. I want to teach you what I’ve learned along the way.

Sabotaging Your Happiness

Doubting Yourself

It’s so easy to doubt ourselves. I think we’re all guilty. It’s just part of being human. I’ve let comments from others dampen my spirits and influence my decisions in a negative way. I’ve found the only person who needs to really believe in me is ME. To build a positive mindset, restructure your thought process. Instead of letting the doubt fill your mind, take a deep breath and reaffirm yourself with positive thoughts such as “I got this” or “I can do it”.

Positive Affirmations really do work and here are some of the ways I turn a day that’s going downhill into one that’s successful.

  • I respond to faith, not fear.
  • Stress is not going to be a part of my life.
  • I can achieve my dreams.
  • My faith is greater than my fear.
  • I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.
  • Today is going to be awesome.
  • I love myself.
  • I am worthy of a happy life.


This has been a big issue for me in the past. So many times I let fear control my decisions. It gripped me and tore me to the point of causing anxiety and depression. Have you let fear cause you to question your abilities? What if I fail? What if all of my efforts end up being worthless? This isn’t you talking. It’s the fear that speaks doubt into your heart.

Instead of letting fear control your destiny, you have to learn how to push past it. It only has the strength that you allow it to have. How many times have you asked yourself, what if they think this is a stupid idea? What if they talk about me behind my back? All of those “what ifs”.

Turn those questions into motivation. How do you do that? Well, it’s simple. Instead of what if I fail. What if I succeed? Rather than what if I waste my time. Make it what if I’m able to quit my day job and do what I love? It’s all about how you think. When you feel like quitting, don’t. When you feel overwhelmed, take a break and a breath and get back in the game.

We only grow and become successful when forced out of our comfort zones.

Making Excuses

Umm, I’m guilty as charged. I think we all are. Procrastination can be a dream killer. They say don’t put off till tomorrow what you can do today. It really is true. Yea, it’s easy to take that extra time to just veg out and be a couch potato all day but where does that get you in the long run? I’m not saying don’t take breaks. I’m telling you we can’t make every extra moment a minute of downtime. Set goals and work to reach them. Make deadlines and stick with them. You’ll notice how much better you will feel when you get a task accomplished rather than just pushing it down the to do list.


Another way you end up sabotaging your happiness is with negative thinking and surrounding yourself with negative people. Negative energy spreads like a wildfire. Are the people who surround you lifting you up or dragging you down? One bad apple ruins the whole basket. Laughter is contagious but so is unhappiness.

Read positive books and listen to uplifting audio with good messages. Surround yourself with people who are happy and filled with positive vibes and energy.

I am working hard to surround myself with like-minded people who are goal getters. People who are happy and leave a positive impression on my thoughts and feelings. This can have a tremendous impact on your growth both mentally and emotionally.

If you need to cut some negative people out of your life, do what you have to in order to reach your happiness goals.

Self-Limiting Thoughts

I’ve been there and it’s not fun at all. It was instilled in me that the only way to a successful life was to go to college. This is what everyone around me did and if you wanted a happy lifestyle or a better paying job, that’s what you did to get it. Don’t get me wrong, college is great and higher education is important in most things. However, not all of us need college to secure a happy and successful lifestyle.

Don’t let popular opinion dictate where you end up in life. What may be right for one person is not a one size fits all. Once you focus on what is best for you, you’ll find what makes you the happiest. Reach for it, research it and do everything in your power to get it. Don’t limit yourself by what you can accomplish because someone else does not think it is the route to achieve what it means to really be happy.

I hope this helps you on your quest to stop sabotaging your happiness because when it comes to finding the true meaning of happiness, it all starts with YOU. Always stay focused, positive and believe you are capable of living a life you deserve.